In my continuing effort to bring you whimsically astute reflections from television's finales, I watched bits and pieces of three season-enders on Monday night: Dancing with the Stars, Heroes, and The Bachelor.
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Dancing with the Stars
I saw Joey Fatone's last two dances and the freestyle dances of all three contestants. The best dance of the night was easily the show-closer where Fatone and his partner started slow, ripped off their exterior costumes and got down with flips and lifts and turns. Fatone's spread-eagle leap over his partner's head was the non-professional athletic move of the night. And his one handed total body flip (the other dance) was the second-best athletic move. So from what I saw (and I haven't watched much of this season), Fatone should be the winner.
Ohno and his partner were heaped with praise for their freestyle, but it just didn't wow me like Fatone's last dance. And Ali was impressive and strong--but bested by Fatone. We'll see who takes the shiny trophy on Tuesday's results show.
Heroes
True to form, Heroes resolved its story, answering as many questions as it posed. For this, in a post-Lost world, we are all thankful. Heroes' characters do not create the emotional pull of the characters on Lost, in fact, every one of them is emotionally expendable, if you think about it. Even if you're a super-fan. For me, the finale was a bit anti-climactic as most of it took place in a sterile office building (and it wasn't Die Hard-good) and it merely played out the actual events we've seen foretold and foretold and foretold.
We waited for the twist to see how things would resolve differently than the prophecy, and that was it. Next season, I hope they don't foreshadow anything quite so knowingly, and they also need to go public. This would be so much more interesting if the public knew these heroes existed--and some could laud them while others feared them.
So what questions are we left with? Whose behind the manipulation of the Heroes? Surely it's not Grandma Petrelli. Are the Petrelli brothers dead? Will Parkman live? Who is the super-scary guy the little girl wouldn't call to mind? Is HRG really named Noah? I will say this about Heroes, great job with the powers, great job with the look and diversity of the characters (and I'm not just talking about ethnic diversity, but diversity of powers, ages, backgrounds), and great job with Sylar--a wonderful mix of scary evil and human and vulnerable (see the story arc with his mom). And as a special bonus we got a sneak peek at the Silver Surfer (from this summer's Fantastic Four movie--simply amazing).
The Bachelor: An Officer and a Gentleman
The military man strung two girls on for two hours, telling them both that he loved them (a Bachelor first), and making one over-confident that she'd be picked (foreshadowing her downfall). As is right and good, the Bachelor chose the more level-headed one with values and better compatibility. Good job. It's just a bonus that she was also prettier.
I feel bad for Tess though, she's marrying the man with the most monotone voice in the history of television, even if he is both an officer--and a gentleman. I kept expecting to catch a glimpse of his cue cards flipping just off-camera, but they managed to keep them hidden from view along with the wireless mics. This guy is a snore, ladies, I don't care if he is ripped. And while I'll admit to watching only about 15 percent of this season and 20 percent of the final show, I still feel like Chris the host was moved to the margins this season. True, literally anyone could host that show, but still, they usually try to insert him into more of the action to justify his paycheck, don't they? C'mon, you've got to be paying the guy for more than just opening doors, melodramatic voiceovers, and "Ahem, there is just one rose left, ladies." Am I right?
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