As I've mentioned before, I keep a detailed list of the movies I watch and the books I read each year. These experiences are charted, graded, ranked, and filed. Last year I gave you a peek, but this year you'll see all my choices--top to bottom.
Here are the rules: It qualifies as a "movie of 2007" if I saw it in its entirety for the first time in 2007 in theaters, on DVD, or on TV. Made-for-TV films and animated features of an hour or more also qualify.
Ranked 57th out of 57, Underdog receives a D- for its failed attempt to reinvent the character for the big screen. Reimagined as a domesticated animal, Underdog just doesn't have the shine he had as a cartoon hero from humble beginnings. Full johnvano.com review.
Movie #56, The Mistress of Spices, was so bad--it was good. In fact, I feel it's a bit of a miscarriage of justice to give it a D, because I might actually watch this thing again for the yuks. Here's a one-minute synopsis: Village girl found to have mystical powers. Girl kidnapped by rival tribe. Girl evades capture when boat capsizes. Girl is raised in cult of spice mistresses. Girl is sent as spice missionary to urban America. Girl must run spice shop for American clientele, but must never leave store nor have personal relationships with her customers or use the spices for her own benefit. Each person has a spice--she can divine the spice that's right for your situation (the cure you need). She falls for a rugged motorcyclist (Dylan McDermott) and doesn't listen to the spices. Calamity ensues. In the end, love triumphs over all and she brokers a way of keeping both herself and the spices happy. Quote: "Chiles, what you say?"
Lies & Alibis (#55) is an empty caper film--only the caper is not about getting loot so much as it is about covering up a mess. Not much to cheer about in this movie--not great content, and not executed well. I don't really know why I rented it (D+).
My kids loved Meet the Robinsons (#54), but I found it a jumble of in-zanity for the sugar-coated short attention span. I got whiplash watching this feel-good treacle about an orphan boy who visits the future to realize what can happen if you only believe in yourself (the New Age message of our generation). There's a somewhat clever bit about the protagonist's roommate all-grown-up. The movie would have been markedly better if each character took a deep breath and relaxed. "Exhibit A" for what happens when you put more than one zany character in a movie (C-).
Because I Said So (#53) was a vehicle for the resurgent Diane Keaton, and while we love the flustered characters she often plays, we like her best when she also is intelligent and professional. Here, she was only madcap as a hovering and interfering mother prone to bouts of tears. Hard to care what happens when there's no dramatic tension (C-). Largely panned by the critics, I decided to see it anyway.
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